Weird Things I Learned About Sweden and Stockholm

I went to Sweden without having done my usual research assignments. When I travel, I like to learn as much as I can about the destination beforehand, otherwise I become that crazy person at the museum who tries to read what each and every plaque says. I just don’t want to miss out on anything! I like learning!! *pushes nerdy glasses up on nerdy nose*

This trip was different. I was primarily going to visit my lovely friend Linda - I didn’t expect that I would fall in love with Sweden and Stockholm! And like any great love, it wasn’t actually the obvious attractive qualities which drew me in…

Yes, Sweden has amazing social services! Yes, Sweden only sends 1% of its waste to a rubbish dump and produces 48% of its energy from renewable sources! Yes, they designed the seatbelt among many other life-changing inventions! Yes, they have given us ABBA and Alexander Skarsgard! Yes, IKEA!

But, it was actually the quirky and unique things I discovered about Sweden which established my strong love affair. I thought I’d share a few with you here today :) 

• The Swedes have the MOST bizarre idioms and phrases. Linda and I laughed ourselves silly comparing Swedish and English sayings. Here a few of my favourite Swedish ones:
  • “Smaken är som baken, delad" – The preference is like a butt, split (self-explanatory)
  • “Att gå som en katt kring het gröt” - to walk like a cat around hot porridge (meaning, to beat around the bush)
  • “Jag anar ugglor i mossen” - I sense an owl in the swamp (meaning, to have a bad feeling about something)

• The Swedes have a song about payday. And every time it’s payday, it plays on the radio. This is because everyone basically gets paid on the same day. IS THIS WEIRD OR WHAT. Also, imagine how rich the song’s composer must be. He’s going to be celebrating payday for a looong time.

• Everyone uses really long shoehorns. I don’t think they even have short shoehorns. This is actually quite genius if you think about it. With such a long handle, you never need to bend down to get your feet into your shoes!

• On that same note - they don’t use butter knives. They use little tiny wooden spatula type utensils to spread their butter. Linda’s sister told me that when there are no clean butter-spreaders left in the drawer, and she has to resort to using a knife that it’s so annoying. Ha! I took some butter-spreaders home with me, and they’re the best souvenir.

• They have lots of days which celebrate food! They don’t just celebrate New Years, and Midsommar. For example:
  • Waffle day, March 25th
  • Cinnamon Bun day, October 4th
  • Shrove Tuesday aka Semlor day

• The mailman, or mail person I should say, rides a scooter in Stockholm. A scooter!

• They sell milk in the grocery store just for latte art. They also sell fish eggs in a tube, and people eat it for breakfast.

• For celebrations, vodka is infused with candy (SNAPS). This produces a not unpleasant minty sweet aftertaste. I’m down for it. Before you take a shot of it, you have to shout “Skål!”, and also make eye contact with everyone around you.

• I went to Stockholm over Midsommer, which was an unforgettable experience. My biggest bit of culture shock from the celebration was actually that every single person knew every single word to all the Midsommer songs. And we’re not talking like one or two merry ditties. There are enough songs to make a Greatest Hits album. And they’re all so strange!! And have choreographed dance moves to go with them! I love you, Sweden.

• On that same note, the Swedes have another celebration which is not to be missed: Crayfish Parties. Yes, they host a party in which the main event is eating crayfish outdoors. Everyone wears a pointy hat, and there are also special lanterns with moon-smiley-faces hung. This is normal.

• In the grocery store near Linda’s place (called ICA and pronounced eekah), there are giant mechanical animals and puppets placed randomly around the display cases. A waving bear, a monkey on a trapeze, and two creepy Asian dolls having tea in the tea section. I probably embarrassed Linda by staring and insisting on taking pictures of them with my iPhone. Poor girl was just trying to get her shopping done.

Sweden, you are a total babe of a country, and Stockholm will always hold a place in my heart.